Sometimes in my efforts to be successful in reaching my goals the ego gets in the way. I've learned this about myself recently. Although I do realize that I am soley responsible for my actions, sometimes when things don't go the way I hoped, I say "it wasn't meant to be". Although that may be true, it was only true because I didn't go about reaching a goal the right way or it may have not been what I truly desired in the first place. If along the way in reaching my goals I come to a snag or obstacle, instead of saying "it wasn't meant to be", I'll look at the obstacle as a learning tool and find a way to resolve it or turn it into a positive.

It's been such a long time since I've written. I really don't have so much to write about. Things seem the same but different a little better. I'm still at my not great job but I have had some leads as to different employment; got a new car and that was because my old one decided to quit running on me on my way to work one very cold (10 degrees) January morning. Yes, my old car told me "I'm not taking you places anymore". I realized that when it wouldn't even let me get off the busy highway and turn into the bar where my ex-husband lived most of his time. I put alot of money into that beast and it is still running, I think it just didn't want me to drive it anymore because all that was wrong is that it didn't have a drop of antifreeze in it; the plug was loose on the bottom of the radiator. I gave it to my oldest daughter, figured her father didn't do much for her while he was with us and took it as a sign since I broke down right in front of his old watering hole. Weird maybe but it kind of worked out for us all, now she can drive herself to work, pick up her sister from school and do whatever running around. I was real stressed at first because I never (in my just about 50 years of life) have made car payments, and of course, my insurance more than doubled. I'll be OK though, just have to re-group and re-adjust.

I finally received my Associates in Science in Business Administrations Degree. It took me three long years and sometimes I feel like I've been through hell and back trying to keep up with it but I made it. I may work towards my Bachelors but not until I find a better job.

Although my birthday is this month, it has not been good so far. Tom, my fiance' died last year on the 8th. My ex-husband, my kids father, just recently passed on the 14th and to make matters as stressful as possible, his family is prolonging the funeral until this Friday. My kids are very upset at this so I suggested they make a say so in the matter. Well, even his current wife thinks this is a long time. The kids aunt actually suggested splitting up the ashes. Well, anyway, we'll get through this, I just want my kids to be alright.

Hello everyone,
Just wanted to say hello to all who have stopped to see how I've been. Thank you all for caring so much. That's what I love about blogstream, the people are so sincere, caring and positive. Somewhat stressed, with trying to finish my school and looking for work and keeping up with my family. I have one car and three people who need to get here and there. Trying to stay on a positive note.