I finally got information from Job and Family Services about getting assistance with my medical bills. They kept saying I wasn't cooperating even though I sent them every possible item of information about myself and called them about a billion times. Anyway, the reason I went off on my boss was because I told him I had to go to job and family services on Wednesday at 9:00 and would come back to work. I told my supervisor,"I hate this company because I would not have had to go through this if I would have been hired in after three months instead of 11 months". So now, I have to lose more time just to prove myself "dirt poor with no insurance". If I was a person unwilling to work, the government would assist me in a heartbeat. Especially if I took any money I did earn and instead of paying my bills, I would use the money for drugs or other stupid things and get shut off notices and since they feel sorry for you if you have shut-off notices cause you just don't want to pay your bills, they will assist you.

This was sent to me from a friend of mine
"Taxes & Urine Test
Like a lot of folks in this state, I have a job. I work, they pay me.
I pay my taxes, the government distributes my taxes as they see fit.
In order to get that paycheck I am required to pass a random urine test
which I have no problem with.
But I have a problem with is the distribution of my taxes to people who
don't have to pass a urine test.
Shouldn't one have to pass a urine test to get a welfare check, because
I have to pass one to earn it for them?
Please understand, I have no problem with helping unfortunate people get
back on their feet.
I do, on the other hand, have a problem with helping people who don't do
anything to help themselves.
Could you imagine how much money the state would save if people had to
pass a urine test to get a public assistance check".

So now that I am finally hired in and have been in the hospital a few times for the same reason, I got a notice from the insurance company that our business uses. They tell me the test that the doctors insist I have done will not be covered because it's a pre-existing condition. The doctors are very concerned I may have cancer, well guess what!? It doesn't matter if I do because there's pretty much nothing I can do about it anyway. So what's the point in finding out if I have cancer or not. I am very frustrated and upset and I know it's not the company's fault but I would have been covered and positive steps could have been made. I absolutely hate the company I work for. I spoke to the Human Resource person after consulting the Plant Manager, telling him I had to take time off for the test and he said, my health is more important than packing boxes, he then asked how I was going to pay for it and suggested I talk to Human Resources to find out if there is anything she can do to get help. Her response to me was "are you suggesting I get your insurance coverage activated now?" I said no but maybe she knew of a Liason. She said I should try a private insurance company. That woman takes the HUMAN out of Human Resources. I do have to eat too and paying for private insurance would not allow my daughter and I to do that. Sorry for the novel, just plain aggravated with the way things work.

Thank you all who gave me a motivational push to start looking for a career. I've had some good encouragement from my friends here on blogstream, and I've been forging on looking for a decent job that relates to the studies I've been doing. Updated my resume' and put it on a couple of different job sites, keep looking in the local News-paper also. Looking for work is a job in itself.

I'll be done with my online courses in about 3 months. I will have my Associates Degree in Business Administrations. I just got hired in where I've been working as a temp for 10 months. I hope I can find a decent job. I absolutely hate this place. The management style is borderline prehistoric with a little slavery added to that with a dash of humiliation and mental abuse too. Please please I don't want to be stuck here.

Five things I've heard and will never forget

1. Be careful what you wish for, it may come true.

2. Better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all
(don't know if I agree but I never forgot this)

3. Two heads are better than one.
(it's always, always, always good to get someone else's feedback)

4. It takes a smart woman to fall in love with a good man.

5. Don't always believe what you hear or see.

I'm sure there are much more profound things I've heard but obviously can't remember them.

Tom, I've been feeling for the past three days, that you're trying to tell me something or guide me somewhere. Others may think I'm crazy but I definitely know you're with me. Maybe you just want to be with me, that's cool cause I miss you so much. Tom there was a reason we were in each other's life even though brief as it was; some people don't understand why I can't get over you, I'm not sure myself but I think about you everyday still. I haven't played my drums in a long time, well just a little; there's little inspiration in my heart right now. I bought them a year ago today on St. Patrick's Day. Damn Tom I miss you so much, I wish your arms were around me to get me through what's been going on in my life. My thoughts have been on maxing out my credit cards in cash, change my identity and go somewhere far away. If anyone reads this, I'm not going to do that but it would be great to be Mrs. Irresponsible for a while. Tom, I called your family a little over a week ago, Jack said your Mom's not doing so well, she doesn't get out of bed much at all anymore. I'm glad I keep in touch but your kids still haven't contacted your family yet. I know that is sad, I gave Jack and Mary a phone number, which I thought was your ex-wife's number. Your ex called me on the day of your funeral and flipped out on me, accusing me of taking stuff out of your apartment and saying I had no right to say that I was your fiancé' and that she was keeping your ashes and that you two were planning on getting back together. Babe I know that wasn't true at all, especially since she felt compelled to ask you for money for gas in her car and then showed up with her boy-toy and ended up doing a line of blow in front of both of us. I know you wanted me to put your ashes in a Heinekens bottle and throw you in Lake Erie but I wasn’t about to fight the psychopath for your ashes so I put a picture of you and a picture of you and me and put them in a Heinekens bottle and threw it in the Lake. If you can see this, there’s a picture of the place where I threw you; the picture says “just before the storm”. You told me stuff Katrina did to you that made you want to give up on life while you were married. Maybe that's why your kids haven't contacted your family, I know your family really really really doesn't like Katrina, but I think your family and your kids should contact each other. Your brother Jack said he didn't want to call that number and thought Tommy was old enough to decide if he should contact them or not. Yes, Tommy is 24 but I didn’t know what to say about that at all, it makes me sad though. Tom, I love you and miss you and wish my heart didn’t feel like this so much. Sometimes when I can’t think through a problem, thoughts of you are there instead, I guess that’s why I feel like you’ve been trying to tell me something lately, I know you're here with me.